I start crying this morning while cutting an onion. No, not from the onion, but from a song that began playing on my pandora station.  Ya see, June 22nd marked my 5 year anniversary living in Seattle.  I heared this song just now (LISTEN TO IT) posted below, and immediately think, “that’s it.” These words are EXACTLY it.

I think about the laughter, the relationships, the healing, the mistakes, the growth, the changes, the challenges, the different months, chapters and seasons, the HEALING, the frustration, the deliverance, the DELIVERANCE, the compassion, the joy, the tears, the decisions, the heartache, the self-pity, the selfishness, the travels, the redemption, and the restoration, over these past five years.

I find myself being so grateful for the people God has chosen to transform my life.  SO many therapeutic conversations and SO much sacrificial love have brought me closer to Christ.  Like the story in Luke, the friends brought the paralyzed man closer to Jesus not matter what it took, that’s what these friendships have done for me.

I am so beyond blessed by all of this, and all of you.  Over the past 30 years I have lived this ridiculously crazy fun life, and through it all found peace and joy in our savior.  There is no greater love.   I have spent this week reading old journals (yikes!) and love letters from friends.  I have remembered times of joy and pain.  I have worshiped and cried, and have been brought to my knees countless times.

Thank you Jesus for all that you have given me, for all that you have taken away, and for all that you have created me to be. I believe you’re  my portion.  I believe you’re more than enough for me.  Jesus, you’re all i need.

Here’s to the next five years of adventure!


I know, I know, I haven’t blogged in a LONG while… and If you think this is going to be something magnificently poetic and profound, well, you’re wrong.  It’s quite the opposite actually.  You see, I only started blogging (I actually hardly consider myself a “blogger” after my handful of posts)  with no agenda in mind nor theme to follow– i simply just write what I want when I want, in hopes it will inspire…or, of course, make one laugh.

Well this afternoon i was inspired by something that usually tends to inspire me: people.  If you know me well you know that i could just sit and stare at people for hours.  Not in a creepy-stalker type way, but in a “wow look how God created them, type way.”  I love people.  I LOVE PEOPLE.  I really do.  If there’s one thing i claim to be good at (taking a bite of humble pie) it’s loving people.  Sure, i’m anything but perfect at it, but it’s something that i strive to do well, every day.

Today I had a free moment so I grabbed my latest read (Tim Keller’s The Meaning of Marriage!), a blanket, and my water bottle, and I plopped myself on a grassy hill between the two walking paths on the lake.  I was convinced i was going to nail out at least a few chapters, but i was wrong.  I tried to, i really did, but over and over again i kept getting distracted….by people.

Runners, walkers, stroller striders, rollerbladers, skaters, men, women, fit people, not-so-fit people, homeless people, black people, white people, elderly people, toddlers, mental people, single people, married people, gay people, bikers, and more!  It was SO beautiful.  Everyone was SO beautiful.  Watching these different types of people, at this one place, moving along the same path, with one thing in common: movement around the lake.

I know this may sound a bit cheesy, but it really did make me think of Jesus.  Now, don’t go assuming i’m about to tell you i’ve turned into a pantheist, but i really began to daydream of God as Greenlake.  In a perfect world, a place we all come to.  Going different directions, wearing different clothing, traveling at different speeds, all coming to the same spot, in hopes for something great.  I love how diverse our city is.  I love how it can be challenging to love those not like ourselves. I love how we actively learn to love them.  I learn so much from those challenges.  I love how the way we treat others when we are alone defines certain parts of our character.  I love watching how people interact, converse, and how treat each other.
I walked away from the lake inspired to love people better. Not a love i can portray myself, but a love that comes solely from my love for Jesus.  I long to love people better, but i also know that i could never love these people as much as Christ does.  He loves them and many of them don’t even know it yet! In a greater capacity than i can even fathom.  Jesus, help me see people in this world the way you do. Help me to love them best, and with complete selflessness.

So i guess i’m simply trying to say this:  If God is Greenlake, God must be LOVE.

10 days before Christmas I did strict fruit and vegetable juice cleanse leading up to the holiday. During a documentary kick I had back in September (around the same time i stopped eating meat) i watched one called, “Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead” (highly recommend) which was about an Australian guy who recovered from life-threatening illness by going on an all-fruit-and-vegetable-juice diet for two months.  I don’t know, it seemed like it made sense for HIM, but was not anything I thought I could ever do.  Then, months later, while sitting in front of my mirror getting ready for work, I decided it was time to take up the challenge.  No more Christmas party sweets, seasonal beers, and excessive holiday weight gain.  So i did it.  Nothing but fruits and veggies in my nalgene bottle, blended by food processor, for every meal.  It was by far the hardest challenge i’ve ever done (timing could have had a lot to do with that) but yet, the most fulfilling.  Sure the weight loss was awesome, but everything about my body felt 10 years younger. People would often ask me, lunch.“aren’t you hungry?” and the honest answer was, “no.”  It’s not like I was starving my body from anything, in fact, I was actually getting more vitamins and nutrients from the juices than from my previous normal everyday food consumption. I got full and remained full!
Not only were there physical benefits, but as you can imagine, there were mental and spiritual benefits as well.  In fact, I used those 10 days to pray through a major life decision.  When I felt a peace regarding the decision, I didn’t necessarily understand it because it wasn’t what I wanted, but I knew it was from him.

So now, I’m in the middle of detoxing my body for a second time.  This time, a two week duration.

Juicing takes time and preparation.  This may sound funny, but I view it as an art.  I get to be creative and messy and experimental.    During my first cleanse I  never used a recipe;  it was completely trial and error.  I remember the first veggie juice I made (I make fruit based juices in the morning for my lunch because of the sugar, and then veggie juices for my dinner) I used two handfuls for arugula and 3 beets.  It was disgusting.  I actually had to ease those two veggies back into my diet after forcing them down during that initial juice meal. There are endless juicing recipes out there, it’s almost overwhelming,  I just tend to do my own thing! Like in most cases, right?!? hehe.

So as I mentioned before, I used a food processor to make my meals.  Depending on the texture you fancy you can use whatever you’d like to break down your food.  I like getting the added nutrients from the skin of my fruits and which causes my juice to be chunkier, and I know there are some people who can’t handle the texture.  Anyway, for Christmas this year Santa so graciously brought me an actual juicer.  It took some getting used to as it completely liquefies the fruit or veggie, and you definitely have to use foods that actually CAN be juiced.  No spinach or bananas!

Motivated by facts? Take a look!

Well, there are 3 main reasons why juicing is so beneficial :

  1. The juice requires hardly any digestion, so all its nutritional goodness gets rapidly into your system.
  2. When you juice, you use more fruits and vegetables than you could actually eat. As a result, you are drinking a densely packed amount of vitamins, minerals and other plant-based nutrients.
  3. Liver detoxification

Below are some of the many health benefits of juicing :

  • Improving the cardiovascular system and heart health
  • Detoxifying the liver – this is fundamental for good health

  • Alkalizing your system (vegetable juicer recipes only)

All vegetables are alkalizing. Fruits on the other hand are not; they are mostly acidic in nature.

  • The benefits of making your body PH level less acidic is a subject of its own, so here are just a few juicing benefits;
  • Improved brain function
  • Improved heart function
  • Slowing down the aging process
  • Improved joint function – helping with arthritis
  • Less disease-prone body environment. Acidic environments breed diseases.
  • Better digestion
  • Helping with healthy skin, hair, nails and eyes
  • Increased energy levels

This one is pretty simple. Lots of juicing means lots more vitamins and minerals which are responsible for all sorts of necessary chemical reactions promoting health and vitality and therefore lots more energy. 

  • Rebuild blood cells
  • Improved immune system

Also, I will point out, while I was seeing my doctor last week, I was cleared and encouraged to engage in regular fasts, but also understand it’s not for everyone! 

What are in some of my daily juice you wonder? Great question!  Although I LOVE using fresh fruit, I usually buy organic frozen berries from Trader’s.  I mix it up by buying pineapple, mango, and a plethora of mixed berries.  For my mid-morning/lunch juice I do a banana, apple, orange, some frozen fruit, a handful of spinach and water for my base, all in my food processor.

For dinner I use in my juicer: kale, cucumber, broccoli, and celeryPlus carrots usually and a handful of a fruit that will sweeten her up!

Here are some photos if you’re a visual learner like myself:

first, wash your veggies!

first, wash your veggies!

straight juicin'

straight juicin'

the juice pulp

some compost the pulp, but I usually add it to my fruit juice! No waste allowed! Others throw it in muffins, etc.

finished product!stored meals for the next two days!

Happy Juicing!!

About a month ago I received a phone call from my industry idol offering me a job in Atlanta.
Done and done………or so i thought.
Me being somewhat of a dreamer (wink, wink) immediately began making plans on how i was going to sell my car, sublet my room, quit my job, and pick up and move across the country.
It’s kinda funny, for the past 6 months or so, i have been praying for “God’s best” in all areas of my life, so naturally i thought that this opportunity was exactly that.  It just had to be it, i was convinced of it.
My dream job.  My dream experience. My big break……right?
So, i began to take steps forward, praying God would be clear with his will for my next season.
The 10 days before Christmas i spontaneously decided to do a juice fast/cleanse.  Hardest thing i’ve ever done in my entire life, and probably the stupidest too.  I am reluctant to call it a “fast” because i was so open about it, but i will say it truly brought me closer to the Lord.  I blame the cleanse and a powerful spirit-led conversation with my dad that caused the peace to flee and for my heart to change.
My dad mentioned a time a few years back where he too had the desire to move.  He wanted to spend the last two years of his career in Japan before he retired.  God then began to remind him of all the blessings he had in Washington, which brought him back to a place of peace.  The thing is, i trust God was doing that with me all along.   I recently had been finding myself delighting more in my friends, delighting more in my church, delighting more in my ministry and my job.  I woke up one morning and it hit me, maybe God’s best is in Seattle.  My peace was then restored.

I still can’t wrap my head around giving up a potential wedding in Bali or even experiencing the south for a season, but  i feel more peace knowing i’m staying, even if i can’t fully explain it.  I was journaling this morning about how that peace has now transformed into freedom.  Today, I feel more free to invest. Invest those areas in my life i mentioned, in a different way than before.  It’s a beautiful thing, and i’m excited for it.
I read this on this bus yesterday and was almost knocked from my seat.
From Streams in the Desert by LB Cowman

“It is interesting to study the way God extended his guidance to these early messengers of the Cross.  It consisted mainly in prohibiting their movement when they attempted to take a course other than the right one.  When they wanted to turn left, toward Asia, he stopped them.  When they sought to turn to the right, toward Bithynia in Asia Minor, he stopped them again.  In his later years, Paul would do some of his greatest work in the very region, yet now the door was closed before him by the Holy Spirit.
…..BELOVED, whenever you are in doubt as to which way to turn, submit your judgment absolutely to the Spirit of God, asking HIM to shut every door but the right one.  Say to Him, “Blessed Spirit, i give you the entire responsibility of closing every road and stopping every step that is not of God.  Let me hear Your voice behind me whenever i turn aside to the right or to the left.

In the meantime, continue along the path you have already been traveling.  Persist in your calling until you are clearly told to do something else. O traveler, the Spirit of Jesus is waiting to be to you what he was to Paul.  Just be careful to obey even His smallest nudging or warning.  Then after you have prayed the prayer of faith and there are no apparent hindrances, go forward with a confident heart.  Do not be surprised if your answer comes in doors closing before you. But when doors are shut to the right and left, an open road is sure to lead you.”

Deuteronomy 5:32-33
“So you shall observe to do just as the Lord your God has commanded you; you shall not turn aside to the right or to the left.  You shall walk in all the way which the Lord your God has commanded you, that you may live and that it may be well with you, and that you may prolong your days in the land which you will possess.”

Here’s to God’s best in 2012,

On my drive home from work today all I fantasized about was getting back to my apartment, changing out of my uncomfortable shoes, slipping into my comfy cozies, and getting a minute or two of peace and quiet before the dinner guests arrived.  I remembered I had to stop by Trader Joe’s on my way home to pick up a few things for the meal, so I turned on my blinker to get off on 45th.  There, as I sat in a line of cars, was a tall, nicely dressed black man, waving a gas can as he walked by each car.

“Oh poor guy!” I thought as I rolled down my window.
Me: “Excuse me sir, did you run out of gas?” I shouted across the other lane of traffic.
Him: “YES!” he yelled. “This is so embarrassing, but I’m a few bucks short.  My brother is on his way,” explained the man.
Me: “My goodness! I need to get some change, so why don’t we meet at the gas station?”
Him: “That would be wonderful, I’m just so embarrassed!
I drive two blocks down the road and pull into the 76 where I bought a pack of gum to break my $20.
Once I walked out of the gas station I saw the man waiting patiently by my car.
Me: “Here ya go,” I said, as I flashed him a sweet smile.
Him: “Thank you so much, this is just so embarrassing!”
Me: “No way, it happens to the best of us! God bless”
…..and as I got into my car, I looked up– and saw him dash off full sprint.

I sat in my car for a moment and then blurted out loud, “I think I just got played.”
I don’t know what it was that ignited in me, but I found myself turning around, passing Trader Joe’s, and driving towards the off-ramp I assumed the man so quickly returned to.
I parked my car in the closest lot I could find and started walking toward the  off-ramp.  It was after 5, so you  bet it was busy with commuters.  Then, there I saw him, waving the same gas can around to all the cars exiting the freeway.
I couldn’t hold it in.
me: “HEY! YOU!”
As you can imagine, he looked up in disbelief and was quite startled.
Me: “What are you doing? I just gave you $5 so you could get gas! ……I want my money back!”
Surprisingly, he began to walk over to me.
Him: “Why?”
me: “You just lied to me, and quite frankly, I feel taken advantage of!”
Him: “I did not take advantage of you Miss.  It’s the same as if I was sitting there like that man holding a sign up for food!”  He gestured to another man across the way.
Me: “No! You needed gas, so I gave you money for gas! If that guy needs food, I’ll give him food.  You are making all these people who pass you by feel sorry for you because you’re dressed nice and they think you’ve really ran out of gas!”
Him: “You’re being judgmental.  I didn’t lie to you! Guess what I did? I gave your $5 to that man over there.  He told me he isn’t getting anywhere with his sign and I wanted him to have food to eat.”
Me: “One, I am NOT being judgmental.  This has nothing to do with him and I, this has everything to do with YOU and I.”
Picture it:  I am standing on the side of the road in my Anthro-work-attire, having a heated conversation with a homeless man while every local commuter looked on, witnessing the show.  Only me, right?
Him: “I aint doin’ nothin’ wrong. I didn’t lie to you, or take advantage of you.”
Me: “Why can’t you just say you’re sorry?!”  (I felt like I was fighting with my 5 year old nephew.)
Him: “I am sorry.  But I am homeless.  I lost my house, my job, my family, and ain’t no one cares.
Me: “Of course I care, but I feel as though you’re going about it the wrong way!”
Him: You want to know what I did last night?”
((heart softens here))
Him: “It was so cold last night that all I did was ride the bus all night long.
Me: “What? Why? There are so many cold weather shelters in the city and so many churches that would love to give you a warm meal and place to rest. Why don’t you find one??”
Him: “Cause all those places have bed bugs!”
I laughed in spite of myself.    “Well, what about your family?—-”
He cut me off.
Him: “I don’t got no family.”
Me: “HA! Caught ya! You told me your brother was on his way!  See…you hurt my feelings. Hey, what’s your name?”
AJ: “AJ.  What’s yours?”
Me: “Carly.”
AJ: “Carly, why are you dressed like that? Are you coming from a wedding?”
Me: (chuckles.) “Nope, just work..”
AJ: “Well Miss Carly, I’m sorry I lied to you.
Me: “AJ, we cool.”
As we cordially shake hands:
AJ: “Miss Carly?”
Me: “Ya?”
AJ: “Can I walk you to your car?”
Me: “Why yes you most certainly can”
AJ: “You know….I’m on the internet….”
Me: “Hahahahhahaha, what?”
AJ: “I’m a referee on the movie the 6th man!”
Me: “OK I’ll look for you. Take care of yourself AJ. I’ll be seeing you.”
AJ: “You know what Miss Carly? You’re not as tough as you think you are.”
Me: (smiles.) “I know.”
I got in my car and headed to Trader Joe’s.

On my way home I passed the off-ramp and couldn’t help but look for AJ.  Just as I figured, he was gone.

Tonight when I got home I spent almost an hour finding AJ forgetting the time stamp on the video.
I did.  It is his moment of fame. Just as he told me, at minute 1.44.

Malibu is the one place I see God in everything.

Cue journal entry from Aug 2:“God, I see you so vividly in this place.  I see you in the snow-capped mountains, I see you in the inlet waters that glisten majestically, I see you in all the beautiful faces you’ve brought here…”

So, I guess it makes sense that He would pluck big city girl out of her everyday rat-race of a life, only to drop her in a place like that, to speak so powerfully to her heart….right?
It sounds cliche, but God “changed my life” during my week at Malibu this year.   Why this year and why now? Great question, I have no idea, but I am eternally grateful for it.  It was odd… i felt the change, but didn’t see it play out until i returned.

Richard Dahlstrom once said (thank you Greta for the reminder) something along the lines of, “No one just wakes up on the top of Mt. Rainier.  To get somewhere starts with a vision of where you want to go, and then the only way to get there is with lots and lots and lots of steps.  And no step is significant.  And every step is significant.  They’re all necessary to move you towards the vision…”   That’s why I wasn’t surprised when my life was changed, not by a powerful message from a speaker, nor by chariots of fire coming down from Heaven, but simply by taking the “next step. ” 

You see, every single day, in one way shape or form, I have been reminded to “WAIT.”  Not on the man I wish to marry, not on the promotion at work, not on any expectation or anticipation, but solely on GOD.
Last week i was hit with this during a morning devo:

“I waited patiently on the Lord.” (ps 40:1)
Ha. Patience? This girl lacks that, big time. 

“Waiting is much more difficult than walking, for waiting requires patience, and patience is a rare virtue…” (**Ya got that right**) We enjoy knowing that God builds hedges around HIS people, when we look at the hedge from the aspect of protection (**truuuue**) But when we see it growing higher and higher until we can no longer see over it, we wonder if we will ever get out of our little sphere of influence and service, where we feel trapped.  Sometimes it is hard for us to understand why we do not have a larger area of service, and it becomes difficult for us to “brighten the corner” where we are.  But God has a purpose (**PTL**) in all of HIS delays.  “The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord” (ps 37:23)
Once we learn to wait for the Lord’s leading in EVERYTHING (**!!!!!!!!!!!!!!*) we will know the strength that finds its highest point in an even and steady walk.  Many of us are lacking the strength we so desire, but God gives complete power for every task HE calls us to perform.  WAITING: keeping yourself faithful to His leading–the secret of strength.  Watch and wait for his leading. (Streams in the Desert)

Ok, got that. Check.

Then, I start to realize during my life-changing pursuit, that God’s BIG picture outweighs all my petty day-to-day fears and worries.  I don’t know about you, but when He is SO big in your life, everything else seems so small.  And furthermore, I am too small to mess up any plan God has for me.  Fact.

A couple of months ago I had this undeniable feeling that I was on the verge of a season-change.  What that meant, I had no clue.  So I diligently prayed through it and with that, I’m now recognizing (almost daily) the shape of this changing season.  Whether  it was cutting off dead branches of past struggles by taking steps towards complete restoration, or God forcing me to engage in healthy, liberating conversation in a stairwell, or Him finally freeing me of any remnants of a year-long crush, God really has been coming through with delivering his promises.  THE BEST reminder of God’s faithfulness wasn’t the vivid rainbow I saw driving yesterday (although that was pretty rad), but  simply was the fact i stayed engaged (even when i did not want to) and i continued to trust and obey, no matter how difficult the trials seemed or how deep the muck seemed.

I was reading the other morning an entry from Streams in the Desert about these same small miracles, these simple rescues, happening to Paul on a voyage to Rome.  He was hunted down by persecutors and forced to flee for his life, yet God delivered him from his enemies by providing a simple basket his followers were able to lower him over a wall with.

Simple. Love that. 

“God’s promises  and HIS providence do not lift us from the world of common sense and everyday trails, for it is through these very things that our faith is perfected. And it is in the world that God loves to interweave the golden threads of his love with the twists and turns of our common, everyday experiences.” from Hard Places in the Way of faith.

Today marked my 9th consecutive day worked.   I got in at 6, which meant around 8:30 I was  overdue for my second cup of coffee.  I walked aimlessly into Starbucks daydreaming about God knows what, ordered my drink, and stood dazing off into who knows where,  as I waited patiently.

him: “Hey you! You in the blue dress!”

I was a bit startled

me: “me?!”

him: “No, the other girl in a blue dress standing behind you!”

Yes,  I looked, I’ll admit it.

me: “Yes, sir?”

He looked as though he was pushing 90, sitting there cross-legged with long grey hair and an old battered starbucks hat, having coffee with a younger woman who looked like she might be his daughter. I could tell by her smile that he must have stopped mid-convo to talk to me.   

him: “What side of the chicken has the most feathers?”

I paused. 

me: “You know sir, I can’t say that I know”

him: “well, the outside of course!”

And then,  I started laughing uncontrollably with this old man, and his face lit up as if he had just won the lottery.  I grabbed my coffee, headed towards the door, threw my arms around his neck, and thanked him for making my day, as I laughed the entire time.

then he said this…

him: “Honey, I can tell by your laugh you love people well.”

me: “What? Really?  I don’t know abou…”

him: “SHHH! Stop.”

as he held his finger up to my face. 

him: “I’ve lived in this world a lot longer than you have, so don’t you question me missy….but you are right about one thing, sometimes all it takes is a simple joke, paired with laughter, to make someone’s day.”

I have yet to liberate that 3 minute encounter from my mind, and pray that it sticks with me for days to come.

I met Annette just after she celebrated her 99th birthday this past January. From the moment I laid eyes on her I knew we were going to have something very special.  I’ve been spending  my Tuesday nights at Arden, a rehabilitation center for low-income residents,  leading a bible study as part of a community group for the past 5 months.

Annette’s my little dolly. I look forward to the unfiltered words that come from her mouth each week.  Each time I see her sweet face she has something candid to say…. “Honey, your hair’s a mess!”  “Where did you get those long eyelashes? Save some for the rest of us!”  “I was already married for 12 years at your age!” and my favorite, “My only regret is that I never danced on stage…don’t make the same mistake I did!”

Never fails.

Yet every week, as I sit next to my little spitfire, there’s always a point in the study she looks over at me and reaches for my hand to hold.  It never ceases to melt my heart and bring a tear to my eye.

Annette taught me how to play Kings Corners….yes I, Carly, learned a card game…hard to believe i know.
I am continually amazed by her sharpness at the ripe old age of 99. Throughout the game she shares the same stories of growing up in an orphanage and how she made the decision not to attend the monastery like her 3 other sisters did.
I am enamored by her beauty and charisma, and most nights I just sit there and stare at her.

Before I leave each week Annette always pulls out her perfume bottle…which she stuffs behind her back in her wheelchair seat ….next to the hand mirror and baby powder….and tells me to put some on so that I will smell “lovely” and so that I will attract a man.  I’ve learned if I want to avoid leaving smelling like a dusty floral shop for days, i need to pretend to squirt it on my wrists and rant about the glorious smell to convince her I love it.

The best part of my night is when I get to wheel her back to her room across the facilities.  Usually we spend a moment talking about the lesson from the evening and how to apply it to our lives, but there’s always a point in the walk where she starts singing our song.  Every week we walk down the halls, belting out this happy little tune, as other residents and staff smile happily.  Last night I asked her for her permission to record her, and she sat up as straight as she could in her chair and said, “OH! Yes! Maybe I’ll get discovered!!” 🙂

Volunteering at Arden continually brings me back to the basics.  By sharing a simple kiss, a gentle touch, an open ear, or even just a smile, I see how influential these acts can be to one’s heart.   I never imagined I’d see God the way I do after being a part of this group, yet I am constantly seeing more of who he is through each of  these residents each week.

May this song bring joy to your day 🙂

Today while shopping at my local Trader Joe’s I reached effortlessly for a bag of organic spinach, only to be caught off guard by the freshness stamp.  “Best used by April 29,” it read.  

“Geez, that’s my birthday!!…gulp.” 

I stood chuckling to myself at the irony, which lead my mind to the realization that in just days i would turn yet another year older.

“twenty-eight” rhymes  with “great,” ……….right? ….right….RIGHT?!?
I was hit with what seemed to be a panic stick.

“I’m about to be 28…twenty-eight….TWENTY-EIGHT!!!!”  I don’t have a house, i don’t have any babies, i don’t have a husband….heck, i don’t even have a current crush! I’m so far behind!!!”   THEN, in the midst of the mind games, God (it had to be) stopped me abruptly in my tracks and whispered the most gentle, soothing words in my ear….
“Carly,  STOP.
You. Are. EXACTLY. Where. YOU. Need. To. Be.
I AM writing your beautiful story, remember?!” 

Why Yes…I am… and YES….you are!
Then i remembered, my life is not measured by the numbers on my birthday cake and my success is not defined by the things that i own.  I have been called to LOVE people generously, with complete reckless abandon, portraying just a portion the love that Jesus has for us.  I do love with my whole heart (which at times can be a blessing and a curse) and the older i get, the capacity for love in my heart only seems to grow.

Finally i remembered this promise, “There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under heaven…..” ecclesiastes 3

So i took in a deep breath, switched the bag of spinach for a May 2nd date stamp, and continued on towards the frozen food isle.

If the good Lord were to come down and ask me,
Carly, show me in the form of a music video the kind of love story you desire from me…
This is what i would choose for myself.
Well, everything except for the Vegas wedding part….

click on this vid and watch it…you’ll be glad you did.